Category Archives: Wedding

Parsi Wedding as the British Dy. High Commissioner sees it


British Deputy High Commissioner, Mumbai invited to a Parsi wedding for the first time, and gives a ‘thumb-nail’ review of the community’s current situation.

 

From wedding feast to global business – never under-estimate the Parsi influence for good in Mumbai

 

I was fortunate recently to attend my first ever Parsi wedding. Two of the 40 or so Parsi staff in the Deputy High Commission in Mumbai, Nazneen (our press officer) and Burzin ( a member of the UKBA team), were getting married, and they had been kind enough to invite my wife and me to their wedding.

 

There are many contrasts with a typical UK wedding. First there were far more people – about 700 – than most people in the UK would normally invite but Indian festive occasions extend beyond the immediate family and friends of the couple to include the social and business obligations of parents and siblings on both sides. The couple are married on a dais after which all the guests go up to meet and greet them individually.” Then there is food, and lots of it! The food is served on a large banana leaf – I had never realised, until I saw mine covered with delicious fish, chicken, rice and much more, how big a banana leaf is! Afterwards, and perhaps this is the biggest difference with Britain, most of the guests depart without so much as one speech: something many people might welcome in the UK.

 

The Parsis have kept these traditions, and many more, ever since they first emigrated to India from Iran centuries ago. During the wedding the couple went to a nearby “Fire Temple” to pray. These are so named because a fire burns in them eternally as it represents purity, being the only element that cannot be contaminated. In continuance to the original vow made when they first sought refuge in India, Fire Temples admit only Parsis. Pheroza Godrej, who edited a superb book on the origins and development of Bombay, has produced a magnificently illustrated History of the Parsis. I can’t claim to have read it, but it is a labour of love and meticulous research, which wowed some recent visitors from Europe at her home.

 

The Parsis have a wholly disproportionate influence in Mumbai and India compared to their tiny population. Globally there are probably no more than 120,000, with the largest group outside Mumbai in Toronto.

 

The Parsi influence was underlined shortly after the wedding I attended by an announcement by the Tata Group – India’s largest business conglomerate, and of course with major interests in the UK, including JLR and Corus – that they were appointing as their next chair a Parsi, Cyrus Mistry. Tata was founded by a Parsi, Jamshyd Tata, who was brought up in the small, dusty trading town of Navsari on the Gujarat coast. He started a steel business in Eastern India, and from there his successors as Chairmen– Parsis all – have built the company into the $78bn megalith it is today.

 

There are other powerful business groups in India with Parsi owners, including the massive consumer and industrial goods manufacturer Godrej, and smaller companies like Pune-based Forbes Marshall and Thermax.

 

But the Parsi influence goes way beyond business. Tata have some of the most well-endowed Foundations and Institutes in India, and a significant proportion of the Group’s profits are ploughed under its constitution into these charitable organisations. It is no exaggeration to say that many of Mumbai’s most valuable research organisations, hospitals and cultural centres (for example the vibrant National Centre for the Performing Arts, run by a Parsi, Khushroo Suntook, formerly a senior Tata executive) could not survive without Tata, Godrej or other Parsi generosity.

 

So from a banana leaf feast to the next head of global giant Tata the Parsi influence continues to hold great sway in Mumbai.

 

Peter Beckingham

British Deputy High Commissioner, Mumbai 

Courtesy : Hushang Vakil

Varovar

Varovar

Varovar can be done anytime after the wedding, depending on both the parties.  It can be done the next day, next week or next month.

Only after the varovar is done you may pick up the Madavsoro –no-pot and empty out all the Ses of Paan, sopari, coconut rice, kankoo etc. and it should be put in the Sea or running water.

A small vase/vessel/ that has been brought by the Bride should be decorated with teeli and garland put in 5-7 pedas (sweet meat), Paan, karek, sopari, badam, sakar.

On the top put the red cloth (approx.1/2 to 1 mt.) from which small dress can be stitched on the 6th day after the first child has been born. Put coconut balanced on the red cloth Pointing upwards Garland the vase. And do sagan to them both and give the vase and an envelope to them both.  If it is decided earlier some people may even return the ring to the Groom that was previously gifted as Sala Dakhal ni ring.

On the wedding Day !

THE DAY OF THE WEDDING
The day begins with Chowk Toran Divo/Batti Loban sagan ni sev, dahi etc.
See that the Divo/Batti lasts for 24 hours.
After bath Clean and arrange the Full Ses, put a bowl of rice.
Bride/Groom takes bath milk and flower and do sagan and give the coconut in his hand which He/She has to take it for the wedding along with a sagan nu evelope, go to Agiary and seek blessings of Ahura Mazda.
Varadh Pattar Ni Baaj will be done this morning in the Agiary…this is done to invite Ram Yazad and All our dear Asho Farohar to the wedding.

What the Groom’s side will take in the evening for wedding:
You may take few things in the bag everything will not fit into the Ses
Full Ses with every thing fresh and new including fresh kankoo.
One white handkerchief for Nan Nahvane mate.
One Napkin
Some tissues
In the Ses put Nahan Nahavano Towel, Chappals
Soap pot, Talcum Powder, Shampoo, perfume, Hair Brush,
Shirt, Pant, Sadro, Underwear, Shoes, Socks, Kasti, Hankerchief.
Pheta/Pagdi
Ara antar no doro
1 set of saree for the Bride (Pachli lagan na Kapra) which can be given to the girl before or after the wedding.
Envelope + Ring for the Bride’s brother .
Wedding Ring /Band for the Bride (keep it in your purse)
Envelope + Shawl for Bride’s father
Coconut for the wedding
Sasra Khore Bese teni Jewelry earings or necklace (whatever is decided beforehand, something like a jesus piece necklace might be innapropriate here.)
All the envelopes
Bag for all the gift envelopes
Extra Plastic Bags to put shoes and wet towel etc.
Everything in the ses that you prepared yesterday.
If there is new furniture in Groom’s house put garland on all.
Keep Achoo Michoo tray ready for the night when you return home.
While leaving from home do sagan and give another coconut (the one for the wedding will be given after Nahan)
Also remember to keep the Bed ready for the Bridal Couple for the night and keep one coconut ready, Mother in law will take the coconut round seven times over their heads and break it. Take ovarna with rice.

What the Bride’s side will take in the evening for wedding:
You may take few things in the bag everything will not fit into the Ses
Full Ses with every thing fresh and new including fresh kankoo.
One Napkin
Some tissues
In the Ses put Nahan Nahavano Towel, Chappals
Soap pot, Talcum Powder, Shampoo, perfume, cosmetics, safety pins, hair pins.
Hair clips, hair brush,
Saree, Blouse, Peticoat, Sadro, Underwears, Shoes, Kasti, Hankerchief.
1 set of saree for the Bride (Pachli raat na lagan na Kapra) which can be given to the girl before or after the wedding.
Ara antar ni saree/material
Ara antar no doro
One Kanchli
Envelope + Ring for the Bride’s brother .
Wedding Ring /Band for the Groom (keep it in your purse)
Coconut for the wedding
Envelope + Shawl for Bride’s father
All the envelopes
Bag for all the gift envelopes
Extra Plastic Bags to put shoes and wet towel etc.
Everything in the ses that you prepared yesterday.
Chairs to be sent to the Baug before hand
One teapoy
Lamp with bulb and plug.
Varbeda ni Tamri (or a vase or ..)
Pug dhoyani tray or khumchi with a small glass in it.
Ghee apiyano kasio (copper) with a small paket of Ghee and Jaggary which will be taken by the Dastoorji who comes for Nahan.
Make prior arrangement for the Beautician to come.
While leaving from home do sagan and give another coconut (the one for the wedding will be given after Nahan)

Ceremony to be done after Nahan
When the Groom is ready do sagan, put on Garland, Give Shawl, Flower Bouquet And Lagan nu Coconut.
Groom will be invited by the Mother-in-law to stand on the steps of the stage where she is waiting to do Achoo Michoo to the Groom.
Bride’s mother does sagan to the Groom and Bride’s mother puts on the watch.
Groom will then go and sit next to Dasturji awaiting the Bride.
Sister-in-law will come wash his hands and the Groom will give her an envelope.
Both the Father-in-laws will exchange shawl and envelopes.
If any senior member of family is to respected you can invite them and give them shawl and/or an envelope
Brother –in-law to be invited, do sagan and put on the ring and give sagan nu envelope.
Arrange for someone to stand near the gate to welcome the guests in.
Persons who are coming to stand as witness should be made ready.
Once the Bride is ready, both the Bride and Groom along with the witnesses will have to sign the form of willingness to get married in the presence of the Dastoorji. Marriage certificate takes time in coming from the Parsi Punchayat.

Get Ready for the Ashirwad
Dastoorji, Both the witnesses,Bride and the Groom will do kasti, when they put their coconut down please take care.

First the Groom will go to the stage and Mother-in-law will do Achoo Michoo and boy will be made to sit on the chair the two witnesses with the help of the Dastoorji they will hold the Ara Antar nu kapdu in front of the Groom.
Entry of Bride
Bride walks down the isle on the arm of her dear father, who leads her to the stage the mother takes overna with rice and welcomes her on the stage, makes her sit on the chair in front of the boy. Mother of Groom and Mother of Bride will stand behind the respective chair along with the other 4 married ladies. The Groom and Bride will hold right hand in shake hand and in the left hand they will be given some rice to hold.
Dastoorji will take the Sutar –no-doro and tie it around the hands while chanting prayers. Then the Sutar=no-doro is tied around the chair 7 times praying 7 Yatha-ahu variyo. As soon as the 7th Yath-ahu-variyo is prayed the Bride and the Groom has immediately throw rice on each other. Who ever throws first is the winner. Sometimes both throw at the same time ..All is well.
While this ceremony is being done that time presence of fire is a must (loban). Bride and groom pay respect to the fire and bow their heads.

Now the Bride is made to sit next to Boys chair and the Ashirwad begins. During the sacred and important ceremony everyone standing behind, the Bride and the Groom should pray Yatha, Ashem and when asked ‘Pasande Kardam’ they should bow their head and say yes. Both the witnesses will also be asked the same.
The Groom’s father will put garland on the Dastoorji and give them an envelope.
After the Ashirwad ceremony the Groom will put on the wedding ring and then the Bride will put on the wedding ring and kiss each other.
Sister –in-law will come to wash the feet of the Groom with milk. Just put a drop of milk on each shoe and Groom will give an envelope.
Groom’s sister will tie the end of Dagli and girls saree paloo end with pin (known as chheda bandwana) after the Groom gives and envelope, she will remove the pin (care should be taken that the saree does not tear).
Request the guest not to come on the stage right away and the Bridal Couple should be allowed to go the Fire Temple to take the Blessings of Atash Padshah and pray for the Long, Happy, Contended and Successful Wedded life.
After coming back from the Fire Temple the Bride can adjust her Saree, hair, touch up make-up and come back to stage for all the guests to meet.
Dinner is announced, move around the guests meet everyone.
Certain payment has to be done immediately like Music, Electrician etc.
Take care that you check everything and arrange to take Chairs, teapoy, lamp all the bags, ses etc.
On leaving, the Bride’s side can go to leave the bride home.
Groom’s mother will do Achoo Michoo and welcome the Bridal Couple home.

If the couple is going Iranshah the next day keep the bag ready with fresh/decent clothes for Atashbehram, Hotel booking details, Tandorasti (if) names of both side family. Travel arrangement to and fro etc.

Preparations one day before the wedding

From Groom’s Side

Envelope for Mabed who comes for Nahan

Envelope  for  Nahan nahavana akhiyanana

Envelope  for  Ashirwad sare tena two dastoorji-na

Envelope  for  Agiary ma boi dei  tena

Envelope  for  Varbeda nu (hath dhovravanu)

Envelope  for  Pug dhovrave tena

Envelope  Cheda chodvana (optional)

Envelope  along with the Ring for Bride’s brother (Sala dakhal ni viti)

Envelope for Bride’s father along with a Shawl

Envelopes for  50%…..Band, Electrician, Caterer, Lights etc. as per arrangements made.

Some extra envelopes

One Red pen.

Bag for all the gift envelopes

Plastic Bags (some extra)

 

From the Bride’s side

After bath do sagan with an envelope, and She may go to the Agiary accompanied by someone from the family.

One white handkerchief for Nan Nahvane mate.

Envelope for Mabed who comes for Nahan

Envelope  for  Nahan nahavana akhiyanana

Envelope  for  Ashirwad sare tena dastoorji-ne (who stands near the girl side)

Envelope  for  Agiary ma boi de tena

Envelope  Cheda chodvana (optional)

Envelope for Bride’s father along with a Shawl

Envelopes for 50% …..Band, Electrician, Caterer, Lights etc. as per arrangements made.

Some extra envelopes

One Red pen.

Bag for all the gift envelopes

Plastic Bags (some extra)

Some useful Tips and Guide Lines for the wedding in the Family

Some useful Tips and Guidelines for the wedding in the Family

All things to buy and keep ready for the Big Day – early days preparations 🙂

Kankoo ½ kg.
Haldi Powder ¼ kg.
Rice Powder ¼ kg. (rice flour)
Kharek ½ kg.
Sopari ½ kg.
Paan with stems get fresh every day.
Halad na ganthia ½ kg.
Kotla ni badaam ½ kg.
Batasa 1 kg.
Khadi Sakar ½ kg.
Rice 1 kg.
¼ kg. wheat (for Suparani reet)
4 small clean supra (for supra ni reet)
1 dry coconut vati (for supra ni reet)
¼ kg. green moong (for supra ni reet)
Rose water – Gulab Paani 1 big bottle
Mava/Chocolate ni Boi (Fish shaped) (for dahi machli ni reet)
Sev (vermacilli) depending on the no. of guests + 1 kg. extra
Ravo (sooji) depeding on the no. of guests
Vanilla, rose, icecream essence of your choice
Rose water one bottle
Badam, pista, kaju, kismis cut and keep ready for sev/rava
A box of soft tissues
Patlo for the couple to stand on
Red saree or chunni for Paghdi on Madavsora
One 9” X 9” (approx) mulmul no katko for Madavsora
Madavsora ni Pariki (you will get at jewelers)
Chowk purvana few new dabbas
Chowk no chuno
Chowk purvana colours
Oil/ghee for diva (batti)
Charcoal for loban
Sukhad, vaher, loban
Agarbbati,
Kakra ni dabbi
Match Box
Diva na glasses
Flowers to be ordered (Gajro/toran etc) on all days
Eggs 1 dozs for Achoo Michoo
Milk for Rawa, tea, coffee etc.
Milk to make sweet curd (in a big bowl for all and small bowl for the ses)
Sugar
Table cloth
Sutar no daro 2 (2 or 3 taar/strads) (1 for coconut/Madavsora and one to take on the wedding day)
4 small supras (if you want to do the supra ni reet)
Arrange to get a Flower pot with red matti/mud and mango sapling for madavsora (you will get it at any nursery or your flower wala can arrange)
Coconut 2 dozs. New (clean and keep the point, one small one for the wedding day)
Envelopes 2-3 dozens
2 Red Pens
New Notes if possible for pheramni
Plates, spoons, paper napkins, trays, glasses etc. for refreshments.
Cold Drinks
Arrange to get refreshments something sweet, something salty, and keep ready.
Curtains, table cloths, flower vase, sitting arrangements etc.
Music (parsi lagan na geet are fun on these days)

Groom’s Side
Jewllery for Bride
One Gold Set consists of :
Necklace (given on Adarni)
Earrings (Dahi Machli)
Bracelet (Sasre Khore Besare)
Ring (for engagement)
One Gold Ring for Brother-in-Law (sala dakhal ni)
Gold wedding Band for Bride
Silver Band for Bride
Cash Envelopes
One Rial (you will get at any parsi Jweller)
Consists of one Silver coin with green beads
One Madavsora ni dabbi (tiny box)

3 Sets of saree :
1 for Engagement- Red or Maroon Saree, Peticoat, Blouse, Underwear, Sadro, Kasti, Shoes, Hankerchief, Scarf, Red Bengals.
1 for Adarni one-Full set as above of any colour.
1 set of Saree,Blouse piece, petticoat, sadro, Hanky and an cash envelope, for the Bride’s mother (sasu dakhalna)
1 set of saree, petticoat, blouse, sadro (for Pachli raat na lagan na)
One Shawl for Bride’s father, one envelope

Bride’s Side
One Gold wedding band
One Silver Band
One Engagement Ring Gold or Diamond
Gold shirt buttons
One Watch
Furniture
One double bed with saatva mattresses, pillows
Cupboard
Two Chairs
One Teapoy
One Big suitcase (for full year’s clothes etc)
One small ses with batti for every day use
One Lamp
Utensils
Four sets of utensils with cover (you may add whatever the grils wants to use. Cooker, dishes,non-stick, etc.

One bowl for Dahi Machli
One glass or vase for Haath dhovanu (hand washing)
One Dish or flat plate for Pug dhovanu (feet washing in milk)
One Tambri or Vase with a big mouth on which a coconut can stand to given at the time of Varovar.

Any other requirement in the house as per your wish
One Shawl for Groom’s father
3 Sets of saree:
One full set of White Wedding Saree, Blouse, petticoat hand stitched sadro, underwear, hanky, shoes. Saree Pin.

One rectangular double piece to put on the head under the saree Sor.
One Kanchli
1 set of Saree, Blouse piece, petticoat, sadro, Hanky and and cash envelope, for the Bride’s mother (sasu dakhalna)
1 set of Saree, Blouse piece, petticoat, sadro, Hanky and and cash envelope, for the Bride’s mother (Naran dakhalna)
Vaga for the Groom (as per your financial condition)
Sadras
Sleeping suits
Shirts
Pants
Full suit (Shirt,Pant,Coat,tie,hanky,links)
Prayer cap
Feto/paghdi
Shoes
Kasti
Red or White Shawl
Brush, comb

DIVO ADARNI

DIVO  ADARNI

The  2nd  day  after the  Madavsoro is regarded as the day for exchanging  gifts between both the families.

What you need to keep ready  from Groom’s  side

Keep the Big ses ready with Soparo, Paro, Pigani,Gulabas, Paan , Sakar, kharek, badam, sopari,batasa, red Bangles on top of Sopara, Bowl of sweet Curd, 1 silver coin (Jarthost or Lakshmi),

One new Hanky/napkin.

For the Bride Adarni- ni Saree, Petticoat, Blouse, underwear, Sadro, Kasti, Shoes, Red Bengals on the Sopara) + Either Necklace or Earings from the set. Sagan-nu-envelope.

Shoes

Take the Saree set for the Bride’s mother (Sopra na Kapra) along with a sagan nu envelope.

Keep 5-7 envelopes ready for sagan to the other ladies who come along, as previously discussed.

One coin for Diva

Rial  available at Parsi Jeweller

Garland on the Ses

Garland for the Bride

Patlo with chalk and colour keep ready.

Refreshments

Achoo Michoo ni Khumchi to be kept ready for when the Bride side comes over.

 

 

What you need to keep ready  from Bride’s side

  1. Big Full Ses (optional unless the Groom’s side insists) with Soparo, Paro Pigani, Gulabas, Paan , Sakar, kharek, badam, sopari,batasa, red Bangles on top of Sopara, Bowl of sweet Curd, 1 silver coin (Jarthost or Lashmi),
  2. One new Hanky/napkin. Also put in this Ses (Full Vaga for the Groom) all the clothes or some of the clothes (rest can be taken in a bag) Shirts, Pants, Hankies, Socks, Sadra, Briefs, Kasti, Topi, Pheto/Paghri (or envelope)  Shawl, Shoes, Slippers, Soap, Soap Case, Hair Brush, Comb, Perfume.
  3. Watch or Buttons,/Chain Pendant/Bracelet. Vaga na rupiya nu sagan nu envelope. Garlanded
  4. In a Big Suitcase according to their financial status the Bride’s family give their daughter a year’s stock of clothes, necessary items like towels, bed sheets, linen, kitchen equipments, etc. to set up a new home. Garlanded
  5. Aakha varas ni Jewellery…Chain, Pendent, Bengals, Earrings etc. for regular use (can be given anytime)
  6. Utensils..Pad-na-vasan

 4 Big or Small  cooker/utensils  with a  lid as per requirement each filled with :

(lids should not be taken along they should be sent after the wedding)

 1 packet of raw Sev (vermacilli),

¼ kg. wheat,

One small packet of pure ghee, paan, sopari, kharek, sakar.

 One small packet of Jaggery and dry coconut vati.

Do not cover the utensils, take the lids separately or you may put in the suitcase.

If you put the utensils one above the other, then please put the utensil containing Sopari  on the top.

All utensils should be garlanded.

In another Khumcho Saree set for the Boy’s mother with a sagan nu envelope (Sasu-dakhal na kapra) with sagan-nu-envelope.

Saree set for Boy’s sister  with sagan nu envelope (Naran-dakhal na kapra) with sagan-nu-envelope.

One Coin to be put in the Diva.

Saree set for the Boy’s mother with a sagan nu envelope (Sasu-dakhal na kapra)

Saree set for Boy’s sister  with sagan nu envelope (Naran-dakhal na kapra)

Keep 5-7 envelopes ready for sagan to the other ladies who come along, as previously discussed.

Garlands for the Groom and other ladies who come along.

Refreshments for the guests.

Patlo with chalk and colour keep ready.

Achoo Michoo ni Khumchi  to be kept ready.

 

Groom’s side goes over to Bride’s place

First the Grooms side goes over to the Brides place with the Big ses. Girl’s mother welcomes you home with Achoo Michoo. After meeting everyone, make the Bride stand on the patla and do the sagan.  Give her all the clothes wrapped in so things don’t fall out.  She will go and change into her new clothes and when she comes out Grooms mother will do sagan and put a grain or two in the saree, wet the corner (Saree no chero thando karvano) with help of other women drape the saree on her, make her wear the glass red Bangles  and the to be Father-in-Law will put on the necklace or earings.  Mother in law will put on the Rial. Put on the Garland and take ovarna. Let everyone meet the Bride with Best Wishes. Let her come down the patla with her Right Foot.

Put one coin in the diva and wish Good Luck to the couple.

 

Bride’s mother now invites   Groom’s mother- to stand on the patla, does sagan and gives her Sasu-dakhal-ni- saree –full  set along with coconut,paan, sopari……etc. along with an sagan nu envelope. In one kora new mathabana (do not stitch the border of matabana) tie some sagan na rupiya and little chokha, in one corner of the mathabanoo, gaanth mari devano. (for Sasu-dakhal na kapra ni reet, you may with mutual understanding get the blouse, peticoat stitched to the bride’s measurement). This is called ‘Ghere tedvani reet’ when the girl comes back home to her mother’s place,  she may change into this saree and come if she so wishes.

OR –both side mothers-in-laws can keep the sarees for themselves and wear that at the wedding of their children., accordingly blouse, peticoate has to be stitched.

Next comes the Sagan for the Sister-in-Law, invite her to the patla and do sagan and present her with the Saree set (Naran-dakhal-kapra) with a sagan nu envelope.

Serve refreshments.

Groom’s mother  will do sagan  and give envelopes to all the ladies who have accompanied.

Groom’s family leaves taking the Bride along with them, when the Girl’s side come over to the Boy’s house they can take the Bride back with them.

 

Bride’s  side  goes to Groom’s  House along with Father-in-Law

They are welcomed in with Achoo Michoo.  After meeting all the guests. Ask the Groom to come to the Patla, do sagan and give the whole  vaga to him.  Father-in-Law will put the Pheta/Paghdi on his head and  put the shawl around him.  You may give the Gold Buttons  to him now.  Every one meets the Groom and he comes down with his right foot forward.

Groom’s mother now makes the mother-in-law stand on the patla, does sagan and gives her Sasu-dakhal-ni- saree –full  set along with coconut,paan, sopari……etc. along with an sagan nu envelope. In one kora new mathabana (do not stitch the border of matabana) tie some sagan na rupiya and little chokha, in one corner of the mathabanoo, gaanth mari devano. (for Sasu-dakhal na kapra ni reet, you may with mutual understanding get the blouse, peticoate stitched to the bride’s measurement). This is called ‘Ghere tedvani reet’ when the girl comes back home to her mother’s place, she may change into this saree and come if she so wishes.

OR –both side mothers-in-laws can keep the sarees for themselves and wear that at the wedding of their children., accordingly blouse, peticoate has to be stitched.

 

Now invite the sister-in-law on the Patla, do sagan gives  her Naran-dakhal-ni- saree –full  set along with coconut,paan, sopari……etc. along with an sagan nu envelope. In one kora new mathabana (do not stitch the border of matabana) tie some sagan na rupiya and little chokha, in one corner of the mathabanoo, gaanth mari devano.

Put  a coin in the Diva.

Serve refreshment to all.

Serve refreshments.

Bride’s  mother  will do sagan  and give envelopes to all the ladies who have accompanied.

After they all leave the Bride and Groom can have dinner to-ether and then go and leave the Bride home.

 

3rd day can be a free day to make last minute  preparation for the wedding.  Cleaning and polishing the Ses etc.

Today is the day for eating khichri (light food)  🙂  🙂

SUPRA NI REET – Ne – HALDI NI REET

SUPRA NI REET – Ne – HALDI NI REET

Supra ni reet is done immediately after the Madavsoro

What will you need.
4 Supras keep ready in the morning
1 Khalli batto (hand spice grinder ) with one or two harad na ganthia. Put a small garland over it.
1 bowl of ready mix of turmeric powder and rose water
4 supras each tied with 7 rounds of aara-antar- no-doro at the open edge and sealed with turmeric and kankoo paste.(Do not put a knot).
Put 3 kankoo tiliees and inbetween put 2 harad ni tiliees. Put a garland of flowers, a fistful of rice, green moong, whole wheat, a pieces of fresh coconut,(break one coconut and make pieces), paan, kharek, badam, bataso, sakar. If you can get atleast one Twin banana, one small ealichi banana in each supra.

Chalo 4 sohasano Supra zatkva
Clean the place and put chowk. In the centre put the Grinding stone and make the Bride/Groom sit in the centre to pound the haldi. While the supras are being tossed the Bride/Groom has to grind the haldi.
The Four ladies their head covered with scarves sit facing each other surrounding the Bride/Groom.
All the ladies have to toss the supras 7 times and exchange with the person sitting opposite.
Again toss the supras 7 times and exchange supra with the person sitting next to you.
This tossing and exchanging should be done Seven times.
Put supras down.
And the four ladies can hold the Bride/Groom hand and help him to pound the haldi 7 times. (Have fun)

Take a pinch of haldi powder and add it to the bowl you have kept ready with a teaspoon of milk.

HALDI NI REET
Immediately after the supra ni reet the Bride/Groom can go and change the clothes and wear old clothes which should be ok if they get soiled with the haldi stains (easy to wash off).
Make the Bride/Groom sit on the patla and mother can apply little haldi paste on the forehead, cheeks, hands and feet and whosoever wants to apply can come and apply and have fun. (If the Bride/Groom is not happy about it, please do not do it).
You may have fun picking up the groom sitting on the patla 7 times and put him down again. (optional)
(There are others methods also of doing this)
After everyone has finished applying Bride/Groom can go for a bath. Little milk and flowers to be given before bath, and when She/He finishes her bath and comes out the mother can take an egg, take around the head 7 times and break it near the bathroom door in a paper plate or aluminum foil, and take overna.

 

Courtesy : Thrity Tantra (thrity@on-lyne.com)

Madavsoro

Madavsoro

 (Madavsora is done the same day after the Engagement …the beginning, first day  of the marriage ceremony which is done 4 days prior to the day of the Wedding,  where a mango sapling is sowed with wealth of things, wishing the bridal couple health, wealth, prosperity that is  as the small sapling grows into a big strong tree and bears sweet fruits, may your love grow as strong to bear good, sweet  and strong children)

Madavsoro, Supra ni reet, Harad (pithi chorvani) reet are same for Bride/Bride Groom and it is to be done at their individual homes.

Start early by 3.45p.m. So that you can finish everything on time.

Chalo Madavsora ni tayaari kariyeWhat you need to keep ready:

One Mango Sapling

One Big clay pot with soil in which you will sow the Mango Sapling. Prepare the pot of mud, by putting little water and make the mud loose. Put the pot of red soil (previously brought) outside your entrance door, on a colourful chowk near the wall where you will do the the Kharaptoo.

In a small khoomchi/ thali/ tray- Put in one bowl of Kharaptoo, how to make it –  take… 3-4 tabsp. of rice flour and  2 tabsp. of harad (turmeric) powder, a pinch of  kankoo and mix it with Rose water and make a paste.

A small bowl kankoo mixed in rose water.

 A small bowl rice, one glass water paan, sopari, badam, kharek, halad no gathiyo, bowl of sweet curd, Madavsora ni pariki,  a coconut which previously you have readied in the morning.

One galss of water

One small bowl rice

One small bowl wheat

One packet of soonu,rupoo, pearl etc. available at the Jweller

In one plate  keep Paan, Sopari, Harad no Gathio, Sakar, Batasa, 1 egg,

1 small bowl of curd.

2 Sutar na daro (special thread)/ Aara antar no Doro

Keep Afarganoo ready with ignited coal, Kolso pajravvano, sukhad, loban and veher.

One Red Saree or chunni to tie a turban on Brother/uncle who will sow the Madavsoro.  One garland and an envelope for him.

One Garland for the Groom, coconut and an envelope.

One Garland for the Mango sapling

One small mulmul unstiched piece approx. 9” x 9”

Paper Napkins

 

Chowk toran na sagan kari, batii, loban kari ne Dada Ahura Mazda ne yaad kari ne saari doova mongo ne kaam saroo karo, take one small clean coconut that the Boy/Girl will take for the wedding, clean the coconut well but keep the point intact. Put a tili on the coconut or you may even write Shadi Mubarak, or draw a swastika if you like or just a plain tili will also do (This can be done before time and kept ready).

 

Bride/Groom  can be in any comfortable new clothes. Home clothes would do.

Make the Bride/Groom stand on the patla and do the sagan ni tilli, garland and give her a gift envelope along with a coconut that she will be using for the wedding, scarf on head.

The person either brother, mama (uncle) or anyone who is going to sow the Madav (Mango sapling) should also be made to stand on the patla and do the sagan ni tili. And ladies should tie a red coloured paghdi on his head (it could be either red coloured saree, or big chunni not necessarily new) and give an envelope and Mango sapling in his hand.

 All the four wedded ladies who are going to participate must do a sagan ni tilli wear a scarf and along with the bride to be, go out of the house, with loban, khoomchi that is kept ready with kankoo, harad etc.

 

Near the pot make the person with sapling sit, the bride/groom  to be,  stands near him. While the ceremony is being done ladies and bride/groom to be must pray Yath Ahu Varioyo in her mind and seek Ahura Mazda’s blessings.

  1. First he will have to do the Kharaptoo on the wall using his first 3 fingers drawing two vertical lines at a distance of 7” to 8”/
  2. Cutting the lines at the top and bottom, he will draw two horizontal lines.
  3. Now cutting the ends of the corner he will have to draw one diagonal line with three fingers again, draw another paralled line leaving a good distance, similaraly join these lines with horizontal lines, you will get a big square with ends of the line jutting out, now  from left top corner to right end bottom corner, repeat from right hand top corner to left hand bottom corner.
  4. Now with Kankoo, put five tilas with thumb , in four corners and one in the centre.
  5. Clean hands on the mulmul piece that you have taken in the ses.
  6. Now make a hole in the centre of the pot, if required remove a bit of mud in a plate from first.
  7. Put in madavsora ni pariki
  8. Put in curd
  9. Put in little rice
  10. Put in little wheat
  11. Paan, kharek, badam, sopari, halad no gathiyo,sakar
  12. Mix everthing a little, and put in the sapling firmly by putting the mud from the side to the centre, pour little water,  while doing this please pray 7 Yatha Ahu vario, and the 4 ladies and Bride/Groom also will touch the sapling will also pray the same.
  13. Wipe your hands on the Mulmul cloth and spread it on the Sapling securing the ends in the leaves.
  14. Take paan, sopari etc. 7 times ovary ne put in the pot.
  15. The person who does the Madavsoro will take an egg and 7 times ovari ne break it on the right side.
  16. Take a coconut and take it around the sapling 7 times (ovarvanoo) and break the coconut putting little water inside the pot too.
  17. Give him a paper napkin to wipe off his hands.
  18. Give one sutar no daro in the person who has sowed the Madav.
  19. Now take the coconut from the Girl’s hands and mother or any married lady (sohasan) takes the Sutar no thread ties it round the coconut while reciting 7 Yatha Ahu Vario (one Yatha for each round slowly) at the end of the seventh round, break the thread, and twist both ends and with a little kankoo and haldi twist the two ends together and slide inside so it does not open. Simultaneously, the person who is sowing the madav will also tie the sutar no doro round the sapling praying 7 Yatha at the end twist the two ends. Now give it in the hands of Bride or Bride Groom and tell her to put little sandalwood and loban and wish well.  
  20. Give little rice to everyone, 4 ladies, the bride and the person who sowed the sapling- now take overna with rice (take overna of the sapling wishing the couple long, happy and successful life ahead)
  21. Pour little water in the pot.
  22. Bride to be puts a little sukhad, loban and then everyone present can put the loban and take the( afarganyoo) loban round the sapling and then all over the house.
  23. Take the Girl/Boy inside the house, mother to take the overna.
  24. The girl will take the kharpta no bowl and bowl of kankoo and put tila on all the doors 3 haldi and 2 kankoo with 3 fingers. The fingers going from down to upwards and outside to inside (optional)
  25. Please put the coconut away at safe place standing in a bowl till the wedding Day when you have to take it along.

 

For the next 4 days put little water in the pot.

This pot and sapling can be put in the sea or transplanted elsewhere, river, lake after the Varovar is done.

Courtesy : Thrity Tantra (thrity@on-lyne.com)

Sagan/Teeli ni reet

Sagan/Teeli

What  and how to keep ready

Sweep, Swab the floor, Put chowk with colour, hang garlands on the doors.

Keep ses ready.

Garland Lord Zoroaster Photo Frame.

Cook something sweet Sev,Rawo,sweet curd, Dar ni Pori…..etc. for Breakfast.

Clean the place where you are going to SAGAN and put chowk  (if you have carpet, you may want to put a piece of thick cardboard or wood).  If you have a patla clean the patla and put chowk on it (5-7)  and place on the chowk on the floor. 

Person for whom you are doing sagan  (for Birthday, Navjote, Engagement…..etc)  will come and stand from behind the patla facing preferably the EAST direction (optional) with his/her Right foot first.  While getting down, get down with Right foot.

The person who is doing the Sagan will first put Tili on the right foot of the person, then left foot and then on the head.

Small round teeli for the girl and long  vertical one for the boy. (The long vertical mark symbolizes a ray of sun and round mark symbolizes the moon.

Now put Garland first

Then give paan, Sopari, Harad, Badam,sakar and coconut.

Give  ENVELOPE or GIFT

Put small piece of sakar with curd (or use spoon)

Take little rice in your palm and stick it on the teeli on forehead.

Take Ovarna

Let everyone meet and give their gifts.

The person has to get down from the front side with right foot.

Once the person gets down you may sprinkle little  Rose water on the chowk.

Courtesy : Thrity Tantra (thrity@on-lyne.com)

Achoo Michoo Ceremony

Achoo Michoo Ceremony 

What to keep ready:

  1. One Small Thali/ Khumchi called achoo michoo ni ses.
  2. One Cleaned coconut (remove the husk so breaking becomes easier)
  3. 3-5 Paan, Kharek, Sopari, Badam,harad no Gathio, Sakar, Bataso (optional),
  4. One Full Raw Egg
  5. One plastic/aluminum foil tray to break the egg in
  6. One table spoon rice in a small bowl/vati
  7. One small Katli/glass of water

 

How to do Achoo Michoo

When they arrive at the door….let one person hold the Achoo Michoo Ses and stand next to the person who is welcoming guests in..First :

  1. You may put a Paper tray on the left side of your tray (optional0
  2. Take egg and take it around the person/persons seven times and BREAK it on the right side of the person who is entering.
  3. Now take Paan, Sopari, Kharek, Harad, Sakar, Badam with little rice, hold all together and take it around seven times and throw on the right side. (In the villages they throw it behind in the compound)
  4. Then take Coconut again take it around seven times and BREAK it on the right side (you may take help of a male member if you wish and put little water on the threshold of the door) and put it on the right side.
  5. Now your ses only has rice bowl and bowl of water the person holding the ses will  put little rice in the ses and pour little water in the ses and give it to you.
  6. Take the whole Khumchi/ses around the head for seven times and put little water with rice on the right side and then on the left side.(this is to make the Umber/threshold cool)
  7. Take some rice and take OVARNA / Vadhavi Levanoo (throw rice on the person with both your hands and let them in with a  J SMILE)
  8. The Guests will step in with their RIGHT FOOT.

 

Courtesy : Thrity Tantra (thrity@on-lyne.com)

 

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